Like most of you, my life has been a series of ups and downs. In college I was diagnosed and treated for cancer. That was a down. Moving into my first apartment and being so excited about living in a big city was a definite up.
Over the years, work and friends both treated me to real emotional highs and lows. Looking back I realize how easy it was to get excited or feel let down by others. Family, of course, creates a lot of emotional upheaval. Some of it made me crazy happy, some if it made me crazy mad and some, crazy sad.
Meeting and marrying Lane was the greatest emotional experience of my life. I really did not understand my capacity to love someone until we got together. It was wonderful to be able to share happy times and be there to comfort one another when things weren't so great.
Now emotionally, I have flat-lined. I never feel really happy and truthfully I never feel really sad. Mostly I don't feel. I am pretty good at faking it, which sounds so awful when I say it out loud.
Am I the only one who has flat-lined emotionally since losing her husband?